Ashley....Ashley....Ashley...Ashley....

Bear with me...

So I hear these stories all the time...stories about the other Ashley Christensens in the world. Up until recently, my favorite one was a story told to me by my friend Holly. While attending SUU, her picture was put in the school paper as someone else...someone named Ashley Christensen. This Ashley Christensen (not me) was attending SUU, and the paper quoted Ashley in the article and for some reason thought that my friend Holly's picture was a picture of Ashley. She thought it was funny not only because one of her best friends (me) was named Ashley Christensen, but because a girl that sat in front of her in one of her classes was also named Ashley Christensen (not the Ashley in the article either). Then when she was telling the Ashley from her class about the whole story, the girl sitting behind her said, "My name is Ashley Christiansen!" Yes the name is slightly different, but funny enough to make it a good story. This Ashley was also not the Ashley from the article.

Well...I like my new story better. When I started working for Nebo School District, the district called to inform me that my email address would not be the typical email address (firstname.lastname@nebo.edu) because there was, unfortunately, another Ashley Christensen that worked for the district. I was somewhat bothered because I knew that I would/will probably spend the rest of my career in Nebo not getting all of my email. I sent her an email asking if she would forward all of my email onto me. Easy enough. Well...after the first week of receiving my email from her, I was soooo confused because a ton of the email she sent me really wasn't mine. I wondered if she was just stupid and didn't realize it was actually hers. Instead, I googled "Ashley Christensen Nebo School District" and discovered that...haha...there was actually a third Ashley Christensen that worked for the district. I called this Ashley to let her know that I would be forwarding her email onto her. We couldn't let the first Ashley do this because there was no way for her to know which emails belonged to which Ashley. I thought my story was too funny not to share, so I told the attendance secretary, Mrs. Christensen (who also gets confused with me although her name isn't Ashley), my story. Her son was there visiting her, and he informed me that his wife, Mrs. Christensen's daughter-in-law, was also named Ashley Christensen, and that she also worked for the district but had opted out of having a district email address. Thus, she was a fourth Ashley Christensen who worked for the district. He also quickly told me a story about how he and his wife moved into an apartment that had previously been rented by a male Ashley Christensen! Well, the fourth Ashley Christensen story checked out when I couldn't log into the district's subfinder system and had to call and figure out why. Sure enough, the person in charge informed that there were four Ashley Christensens working for the district, causing a lot of confusion. Four Ashley Christensens who are all teachers! I wonder if any of these Ashleys are the same Ashleys from the first story. So much for having an original name.

Teacha Picha

I am a teacher...and sadly...I have to worry once again about that day every year that I have to get my picture taken. And then worry more once it shows up in the yearbook. Okay, I don't worry THAT much. But funny story for you...the picture people thought I was a student when I got my picture taken, so I didn't get a teacher ID like all the other teachers did on picture day. :(

Dystopias and Obama (not to be considered related)

Dystopia (n): A futuristic, imagined universe in which oppressive societal control and the illusion of a perfect society are maintained through corporate, bureaucratic, technological, moral, or totalitarian control. Dystopias, through an exaggerated worst-case scenario, make a criticism about a current trend, societal norm, or political system (www.readwritethink.org).

Just in case you were wondering, books, and often movies, dealing with dystopian societies are my favorites. You may already know this, but I love love love them.

My book favs: Ender's Game, Brave New World, Fahrenheit 451, 1984, Anthem, Hunger Games, Mistborn, The Road, The Giver.

And my movie favs: V for Vendetta, The Village, The Matrix, The Truman Show, Gattaca, I, Robot, Pleasantville, Minority Report...you get the picture.

Who knew, though, that they could be so exciting? Okay, obviously I know, and I was pretty sure my students knew...that dystopian societies could be a fun thing to learn about, read about, and discuss, or maybe I am just a nerd.

And although some of the above mentioned books/movies are only bordering on the definition of dystopian societies, any book or movie dealing with a messed up world/future and/or postapocalyptic society makes me want to curl up in my bed, read my time away, and forget about the outside world.

Why, you ask? I don't know.

So back to the point of my story. I am an English teacher. I just started a unit on Anthem, by Ayn Rand (quick FYI: free classroom sets of Ayn Rand books can be ordered at www.aynrand.org for any secondary educator), and Fahrenheit 451, by Ray Bradbury. These books, like I said above, deal with dystopian societies.

My lesson was scary for me to plan. It was my first time teaching literature (I only taught writing as a student teacher). It was the first lesson of a unit, so it had to be a good one. And...one of my fellow English teachers was coming to watch me teach it.

The lesson went extremely well...maybe even a little too well. After spending the majority of the lesson discussing our First Amendment rights (rights often not found in a dystopian society), we moved on to defining a dystopian society. In order to help my students get the best picture possible, I had them come up with examples from popular books or movies. Discussion.

Went.Great. Not only could students name multiple books and movies involving these types of societies, they could get down to the details about what was wrong with these societies. Once they named a movie, I would have them give a short synopsis that they had to keep appropriate; many of the movies are rated R. They then discussed what was dystopian about the society. They even went into The Matrix and how although their fake society may have been better than actual society, it wasn't better because it wasn't REAL, and they pointed out that we need to have choices. I love my students.

Well...after class, one of my students comes up to me and says, "It makes me feel good that teachers can talk about things like this."

"Dystopian societies?" I ask while thinking to myself...Don't tons of teachers teach books dealing with dystopian societies?

"No, well...just what we're talking about," he responds.

Shoot, he must be talking about the rated R movies, I think to myself.

Great. Great. Great. I think I may have made my first mistake. I did ask them to keep it appropriate, though. And the only thing that makes me feel better is that the well seasoned teacher observing my class didn't seem to find anything wrong with it. At least he didn't say anything about it when going over the strengths of my lesson.

And that is not the only stupid thing I did that day. Once 4th period came around (the last period of the day), I praised Obama's speech on education. FYI: My district would not allow the schools in my district to watch Obama's speech because of too many complaints from parents. They did, though, eventually change their minds, and we watched it in 2nd period the day of my dystopian lesson. But only after those students whose parents wouldn't allow it left the classroom. So basically, praising Obama's speech may not have been the best thing to do in front of my students...even if I went off about how it wasn't political at all. You really really do need to watch what you do and say as a teacher; trust me.

On a side note, I would like to give some credit to www.readwritethink.org and www.freedomforum.org for giving me great ideas for my successful dystopian lesson. :)

I am a teacher

I have had many funny moments since I became a real teacher. Here are just a few:

1) I had a male student teasingly call his male friend beautiful, but to the entire class, it looked like he was calling me beautiful. He turned bright red, and tried to explain away his actions.

2) I had a parent looked really confused the whole time I talked to her about her student. Suddenly she had this look of realization on her face as she said, "Oh! You're a teacher?"

3) I find myself shushing people a lot more and asking people to be quiet outside of school in a very teacherly tone.

4) Very similarly, when I was talking to my brother Devin the other day, I found myself saying, "I need you to pay attention when I am talking," when he started texting on his cell phone. I was totally not meaning to act like a teacher, but I say that to my students all the time and it just came out! Ahhh! I hope I don't do that again.

What are the chances?

Funny story.

So last night, my little brother’s apartment got robbed. When my mom told me, I immediately thought to myself…oh poor big screen TV, surround sound, Wii, Xboxes (is that how you pluralize Xbox?), video games, movies, iPods, Xunes, laptops (including a MacBook), guitars, and every other item worth money you can find in an apartment full of four male twenty somethings. When I actually called and talked to my brother about it, I found out that all that was taken was ONE of the Xboxes, a couple of Xbox games, and a really expensive guitar. Everyone, including myself, thought it must have been some stupid kid, on foot, and by himself, who probably wanted the items for his own use. Otherwise, he probably would have grabbed quite a few more items worth some money if he was planning on selling the stuff. Anyways, they reported it to the police figuring they would likely never get their stuff back.

Not to the funny part quite yet…

This morning, the only other things my brother and his room mates discovered were gone were a couple of bottles of cologne and some prescription pain killers. These things proved whoever it was had actually rifled through their stuff.

So here comes the funny part…

My brother’s room mate, the one who owned the guitar, actually spent his morning traveling around to pawn shops and gaming stores trying to see if anyone was trying to sell his guitar (worth a good amount of money) or my brother’s Xbox (which is quite a unique Xbox with a 300GB hard drive with loads of games and movies on it). Anyways, after he had spent quite a bit of time driving around with no luck, he stopped in at a pawn shop in Provo, where, lo and behold, he found the thief in the process of selling his guitar to the pawn shop!

I mean, seriously, what are the chances that he went in to the exact same pawn shop at the exact same time the guy was trying to sell it?

He went up to the kid, who was 18 years old, demanded to know where he got the guitar, told him he wasn’t going to let him leave, and called the police. The kid was stupid enough to claim that he had just found the guitar by a dumpster! The police showed up in five minutes and started questioning the kid. The kid still denied that he knew anything, but then his wonderful little girlfriend spilled the truth.

The kid ended up living in the apartment building just next to my brother’s. The cops took him home, found the rest of the stuff, and hauled his sorry ass away. He already had a criminal history and was on probation.

So, less then 24 hours later, peace and happiness was restored, and now my little brother can get back to watching all the movies he has downloaded on his Xbox.

I love you Adrianne

I am sad. I am more than sad. In some ways I am devastated. Adrianne McBride, one of my very best friends, died yesterday morning in a car accident. I saw her beautiful face twenty minutes before it happened. Twenty minutes. It is so unreal to me.

I feel both happy and guilty that I shared a bed with her her last night here on Earth. Happy because I am honored to have spent the last moments of her life with her; guilty because someone more worthy should have been able to share them. We had just spent the night celebrating my brothers' birthday with many of my friends. She arrived late to Red Robin, around 8pm, happier than ever. She said "I love you" and "I miss you" so many times that I can't even count. I just wish I had said them more times back. She looked beautiful, wearing black and yellow and one of my favorite necklaces of hers. She was in one of her best moods ever. My little brother had been asking forever when Adrianne would arrive; he was excited to spend time with his "movie soul mate," especially on his birthday. I am sad that in the picture taken of my group of friends, Adrianne hid her head behind mine, on purpose. :)

(notice she has a diet coke with lime in her hand :) )

We spent dinner talking about the movie He's Just Not That Into You, which we had both seen that day. She loved it, as she knew she would. She saw it with her friend Jonny I think; she was glad to have been able to spend time with him.

When dinner was over, I spent the next couple of hours letting Adrianne talk about anything and everything. I hardly said anything back...just listened. For some reason, although I was a little annoyed that she was doing all the talking, I felt like I needed to just listen, so I just let her talk. I am glad now, because I think I can recount much of what she talked about in the last moments of her life.

The first thing we did was head to Victoria Secret, one of her favorite stores. Adrianne loves lingerie (Is that how you spell it? I wish you were here to let me know). Adrianne loves anything that makes a person feel beautiful.

Next, we ran into a friend of mine, and when he told us he had just read The Road, by Cormac McCarthy, she instantly became his best friend and shared her love of everything Cormac McCarthy and her excitement for the movie of The Road soon to come out.

Then, we made a Del Taco run. Adrianne loves Del Taco. She ordered a load of food, refused to let me pay for my own order, (which she did all the time...she is one of the most generous people I know) and got a huge Diet Coke...her favorite. :)

As we sat down, she told me all about her sister's swim meet and how she was hoarse from cheering her family members on. So loyal. She loves her family so much.

She talked about her pregnant sister, the upcoming baby, and how excited she was for it to come. She talked about her pregnant sister's funny belly button and how great she thought it was.

She told me how funny she thought her brother-in-law Greg is and how his funny hand gestures make her laugh. She told me about how he once described his nipples as tarantulas (because they are hairy) while doing spider movements with his hands in front of his nipples. She demonstrated for me as I went into a fit of laughter. She told me how much she loved her sister and her husband and how perfect they are for each other.

She told me about her new job and how much she loved it! She told me about her instant friendship with the receptionist and how much they were alike. Adrianne was instantly friends with everyone.

We then went and hung out at my brother's apartment where we watched SNL. She had comments for everything that happened and comments about all the actors. She knows everything about acting, television, and the film industry, and she has opinions on it all. She talked to everyone like she had known them forever and informed everyone that if they weren't already watching 30 Rock, they needed to be. She shared her love for Alec Baldwin.

After awhile, we left, went home, and started getting ready for bed. She was excited that the only toothpaste I could find was my nephew's...bubble gum flavor and didn't hesitate to brush away while reminiscing about using it in childhood. Adrianne was passionate about everything! Her passion was always something I was a little jealous of.

She was totally okay with sharing a bed with me...it wasn't the first time. I was in love with hers and had fallen asleep in it several times on accident. She didn't mind at all. As we fell asleep, we talked about her friend Scott, about what a great person he was, how fun he was, and how she wished she could spend more time with him. She admired him a lot.

When we woke up. She told me how she hates to eat breakfast, how she hates waking up, and how happy she was to spend time with me.

She followed me to Maverick, filled up with gas, and she was on her way. One of the last things she told me was how much she loved and listened to a certain Death Cab song, and I am sad I cannot remember which one it is. I can't remember if I said I love you when she left, and I am sad about that.

About twenty minutes later, she joined all of our past loved ones on the other side. I will miss her, and I regret that I was not a better friend to her.

Adrianne was there for me in all the times that mattered most in the nine months that we were friends. She was strong in a way that I was not, and she lent some of that strength to me.

Adrianne- You taught me to be a little more passionate, a little more strong willed, and a little more empathetic. You felt peoples' pain in a way I know I never will be able to. You made me feel beautiful and loved. I have never had a more loyal friend than you. You are amazing!! Someday, I hope we meet again, and I hope you will forgive me for my shortcomings. Because of you, I will be a better friend to everyone I come in contact with. I will love you forever, for eternity.

Your friend,

Ashley

I wish I could be creative like this...

Before...



After...




Maybe someday...